Reclaiming My Life: The Spiritual Journey to Freedom

My relationship with Alex was slowly killing me from the inside. I felt as if I were decaying, rotting alive. I am reminded of that Canadian film "Thanatomorphose." It perfectly mirrors my inner state.

With him, there was no growth; I felt stuck in place. The only constructive activity during those two months was watching films and TV series in English, which helped me expand my vocabulary. Otherwise, nothing — no progress.

I suffered from depression, mood swings, and constant fatigue. And the cause of it was esoteric in nature. Of course, there will be those who won't believe a word of what I'm about to share, but I will tell my story nonetheless. Recently, I’ve started studying and practicing this subject myself, but back then, it was only my sister who was involved in this.

I asked her to scan me — my energy field. She saw an aura that was terribly weak, with holes, and an entity had attached itself to my field, draining my life force. This is why I was constantly in such a depressed state. Alex, in the most literal sense of the word, was sucking the life out of me.

My sister cleansed my aura — removed the entity and closed the holes in it. To solidify the result and strengthen my energy field, I began doing meditative practices. From that day, until he kicked me out, I meditated every single day.

A week later, my sister scanned me again to check everything was in order, and she saw another entity. I had a contract with a demon, and it came to me through Alex. I had desperately asked the universe for money to pay off my debt and leave, but my request was heard not up there, but down below.

My sister broke the contract. I continued my meditative practices and tried as hard as I could to mentally detach from Alex, so he could no longer harm me.

After the cleansing, my psychological state improved significantly. I wasn’t in constant depression and drained of energy anymore, but I still felt weighed down by the fact that I couldn’t leave him — I simply had nowhere to go.

You know, the moment when he first said he didn’t want to live together came right after a meditation in which I was getting rid of unnecessary people, ejecting them from the train of my life. I repeated this meditation later, and eventually, the final argument took place. I got what I wanted — he left my life. What is this, if not the power of thought? Our mind holds boundless possibilities; we just need to learn how to harness them.

And after all of this, after everything that had happened, after what he had done to me, he dared to say I used him, betrayed him, stabbed him in the back. In fact, it was the opposite — he was the one who used me.

Even the angels refused to offer their guidance while I was with him (my sister can also communicate with them, each of us has angels by our side.). This only happens when you stubbornly walk down the wrong path and fail to notice the signs that the angels are sending you. But when I first spoke with my sister after he kicked me out, she received the information that my angels had returned with their support. Of course, the angels are always with a person; they never truly leave, but sometimes they stop offering help, stop giving advice.

At first, I cried, I was confused, didn’t know what to do, hated him, cursed him. But then I realized the gift he had given me by kicking me out. It was the best thing he did for me during our entire relationship. Can you imagine how bad the relationship must have been for that to be the best moment in it? With him, I felt like I was in prison; that sense of hopelessness was devouring me from the inside, but he freed me from it. I wouldn’t have made such a step myself, I wouldn’t have kicked myself out on the street.

A couple of days later, when I realized all of this, I wrote him a farewell message, expressing my gratitude. I still have that conversation saved; it was in Russian, so I translated it. I won’t comment on it; judge for yourself, based on what I’ve shared with you.

I wrote: “Thank you so much for doing this, I really appreciate it, no irony. Now I am free and can move wherever I want, wherever my path lies, and I don’t have that person by my side who holds me back, doesn’t believe in me, and belittles my achievements. It’s a shame you never saw what I gave you, it was never enough for you. All my fights with my ex are nothing compared to what you did, that’s now number 1 on the list. Do you remember what I said about people who have wronged me? I leave them to live with all their shit. So, goodbye.”

Alex replied: “And thank you, Diana, for the lesson! Congratulations – you really hurt me well, right where it hurts. I’ve never encountered such a cunningly fucked-up monstrosity. To slither into my trust like a snake, pretending to treat me well, love me, and use me like the biggest fool, while secretly, with cold pragmatism, planning and practicing your evil. And I felt it, which is why I was emotionally and physically shaken. I was trying to get to the truth. I’m sorry, but after everything I heard and went through, I didn’t want to see you around, so I kicked you out and paid for a hotel. You caused me so much pain that I couldn’t stand it anymore. I’m not a masochist, Diana, to then let you live with me or be with you in some way. I had feelings for you. I can’t allow that. Congratulations, you’ve ruined the desire to seriously build relationships and to trust anyone for a long time. I don’t believe a single word you’ve said, turns out all of it was cold bullshit and not a drop of gratitude for everything I did for you. I little by little tried to guide you on the right path, wanted you to leave this fucking whoredom and really understand what you want in your life and go toward it. But now and even before, you twist all my good efforts into your malicious and corrupted understanding. I never tried to do anything bad to you – you twisted everything and are trying to dump that shit on me. But don’t worry, I’ll deal with my own shit, and you just go and stay with yours now without me! Keep interacting with those disgusting vibrations. No one will ever treat you as sincerely, tenderly, and inspiringly as I did. Though maybe you didn’t need that; you’re used to another shitty attitude. I must have made a big mistake, just wasting my precious time on being kind to you and trying to reach your soul, bringing light and love into it. I’ve understood that, and there was no point in doing good and helping you anymore. You still tried and are still trying to smear me with dirt. But I know for sure, I’m not from the mud, so don’t try to suck me back into that swamp again!

You really feel freedom when you’ve earned it, and everything else is illusory, unnatural. You haven’t been with those and in those places where true evil exists, and it might shake you so much that you’ll remember this time as good, because I protected you from every side, cared for you like a close relative. It’s very painful that it turned out this way... I really believed that we could build long and strong relationships, sharing the road of our life through joys and hardships despite all the difficulties. But apparently, God had other plans and showed me your true face and your attitude toward me. Well, probably for the best, I don’t want to go through the suffering of betrayals that you carry with you. Honestly, I regret that I had to kick you out so abruptly with your things. I would never have done that if I didn’t understand that in another way, I probably wouldn’t have been able to break up with you, and it would have caused me more pain and suffering. It would have gotten worse and harder for both you and me. It won’t be easy for me to recover, but it’s alright, goodness, truth, and love always prevail, and that is inspiring! I’m not too worried about you, I know you’ll find more fools and manipulate them into feeling sorry for you!

Goodbye, Diana. I really tried for us!”

You know, I’ve often thought about the situation that happened with me. You know what scares me the most? If someone weaker in spirit had been in my place, they might have ended their life by suicide, unable to handle all that pressure.